Last Friday evening we once again endured the bongs of the angelus before a Major Announcement From The Taoiseach. I haven’t kept track of how many of these we’ve hand since the Before Times ended so abruptly in March 2020. They’ve been hopeful, emotional and boring, usually all at the same time. We’ve been told to stay at home, that we can’t do this or that, that things are terrible, that things are okay and that there is some reason to hope.
We watched and listened and I didn’t know how to feel. I felt flat and happy. We had decided to watch a film once the kids were in bed so that’s what we did. We sat on the same couch we’ve been sitting on to watch TV for the past 11 years, and which has been sat on far more frequently since March 2020.
The next morning, as I’d promised, I brought the kids shopping to spend money that’s been burning a hole in their pockets for months. We wore our masks, along with the vast majority of other shoppers. We had coffee and cakes and bought Lego.
On Sunday we all did antigen tests. We have boxes of them in the cupboard that also houses my cookbooks. When we watched the first Major Announcement, not in my wildest dreams did I think we’d all be swabbing our noses before going to another family’s home for Sunday lunch.
Yesterday, the kids had their second vaccine shots. There’s only one of here who hasn’t been vaccinated, and only because they can’t be as they’re under 5 years of age. I’m kind of holding my breath on that, and also slightly elated that we seem to have escaped infection for nearly two years now and wondering how long we can hold out on that score.
My head is all over the place. It seems foolish to make plans, because we’ve made so many that came to naught. I feel slightly giddy about being able to go on a holiday and bring the kids to a birthday party. I feel very anxious about having to resume a commute. I no longer seem to have a grasp on what I should take from the Before Times and and the Major Announcements.
It’s been reassuring to realise I’m not alone in not being able to read my feelings right now.
Orchids on my budget 